Thursday, August 20, 2009

why john mcclane could probably kick my ass...

i came to the sad conclusion this morning that i will never become an action movie hero.

after another in a series of restless nights, i was running very late for work today. i got out of the shower and realized that i needed to be dressed and out the door in only four minutes. and as soon as i said those words outloud-- "crap!!! i only have four minutes!!!" (...yes, i talk to myself)-- immediately after that information hit my brain, a song came into my head to join it.

as if my subconscious knew that i needed a little something extra to get my butt in gear, it decided to provide a soundtrack to get me going. my very own locker room pep talk. a musical interlude encouraging me through my frantic struggle to find a pair of clean socks. "c'mon, man! you can DO this!!!"

now... it has to be said that i have GREAT taste in music. i know everyone thinks that about themselves, but i'm the real deal. music has been a huge part of my life for as long as i can remember, and i have the obscene amount of cds to prove it. i know good music, is what i'm telling you.

but, out of the hundreds and hundreds of thousands of songs i've heard in my lifetime, which one did my subconscious choose for me? which one did it deem worthy enough for such a tense, early morning situation? which one did it think would provide me with the necessary inspiration to get out the door and catch my train?

"the final countdown" by europe.

"...wait... 'the final countdown'??? ...by europe???"
yes. "the final countdown" by europe.
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

i know. i was as shocked as anyone. i said (outloud), "whoah, what?! where in the-- dude! subconscious! this is NOT at ALL helpful!" but i couldn't get it out of my head. i was putting on my shirt, tying my shoes, and all i kept hearing was that ridiculous, high pitched keyboard-- "doodoodoodoo, doodoodoodoodoo... doodoodoodoo, doodoodoodoodoodoodoo..."

if you haven't heard the song before, i imagine you could find it on itunes. but i wouldn't recommend it. all you really need to know about europe is that they got their name because their collective overusage of hairspray from the mid to late 1980's was found to be directly responsible for taking out 78% of the ozone layer across france, germany and segregated patches of spain and england.

that... actually, that might not be true, but it should be! and so i ask you, does this sound like the type of band bruce willis would have had stuck inside his cranium when he was trying to chuck alan rickman off the nokatomi plaza??? i should think not, my friends. i should think not.

urgh.

looks like i'm going to need to find another plan b. just in case this day care thing doesn't work out.


the five things i fell in love with today...

1) yes, i did make the train. with clean socks on.
2) i love that i grew up in south jersey. nj gets a really bad rap, but i loved it.
3) i should be getting the new madden football game in the mail any day now!
4) i have the day off tomorrow!!!!! w'hoooooooooooooooooo!!!
5) bruce willis? also from south jersey.

song of the day...
"malaguena salerosa" by chingon

movie of the day...
"kill bill, volume two" amazing.

3 comments:

  1. The lead singer from Europe's birthday was this week so they played that song on the radio...it always makes me think of GOB and his magic act from Arrested Development!

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  2. mel-- i think we're pop culture soulmates!!! lol, i swear i was going to talk about gob, but i felt like i was already rambling on too much!

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  3. Love it! The keyboard riff from that song is the first thing I always play whenever I'm in front of a synthesizer.

    While I'm pretty sure that song has words other than "It's the Final Countdown! (dododoooo dooooo)", I certainly don't remember any of them.

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