Sunday, September 12, 2010

NFL 2010

And so-- FINALLY-- we're just a few hours away from the first Sunday of the NFL season!!! W'hoooooooo!!!!!!!

I decided to make some predictions. And I hope I'm wrong. Go Pittsburgh!!!


Green Bay 13- 3
Minnesota* 10- 6
Detroit 6- 10
Chicago 3- 13

New Orleans 13- 3
Atlanta* 9- 7
Carolina 6- 10
Tampa Bay 3- 13

NY Giants 10- 6
Dallas 9- 7
Philadelphia 7- 9
Washington 6- 10

San Francisco 12- 4
Arizona 7- 9
Seattle 6- 10
St. Louis 1- 15


Baltimore 12- 4
Cincinnati* 10- 6
Pittsburgh 10- 6
Cleveland 4- 12

Indianapolis 13- 3
Houston* 12- 4
tennessee 5- 11
Jacksonville 2- 14

NY Jets 11-5
New England 10- 6
Miami 10- 6
Buffalo 3- 13

San Diego 11- 5
Kansas City 9- 7
Oakland 8- 8
Denver 5- 11

*wild card winner

The Playoffs

Wild Card Round: NFC: San Francisco routs Atlanta, Vernon Davis gets a few TDs. Minnesota wins a squeaker against the Giants, despite Brett Favre's 18 interceptions.

AFC: The Jets get the win over the Chargers, as Phillip Rivers trades profanity rants with Rex Ryan on the sidelines. Houston beats the tar out of the Bengals, Batman cries on Robin's shoulder.

Divisional Round: NFC: Green Bay beats San Francisco after injuries force Mike Singletary back onto the field (he gets four sacks and an interception, but also gets called on a critical fourth quarter 15 yard personal foul penalty). New Orleans rips the heart out of Minnesota once more, and Brett Favre retires. And then he comes back. And retires again. Then he takes a job bagging groceries. And then he returns to the NFL, winning another Super Bowl at the age of 47.

And then he plays minor league baseball for a coupla' seasons.

AFC: In the best game of the year, Baltimore beats Houston in overtime on a Ray Rice fumble recovery in the end zone (Michael Oher thought he saw Jesse James in the stands and forgot to protect Joe Flacco's blind side). Indianapolis pulls away from the Jets late in the game as Sanchez gives up two fumbles on consecutive plays to Dwight Freeney and South Jersey's own Gary Brackett. (Rex Ryan loses a side bet and allows Tony Dungy to wash his mouth out with soap live on NBC).

Championship Round: NFC: No team has had a more dangerous offense this year than the New Orleans Saints. Every single day of the year. Except for this day. Aaron Rodgers and the Packers in a big road upset.

AFC: I see Baltimore struggling a bit early in the season, but they'll get on a huge roll late in the year. That continues today. The Ravens in a blowout.

THE SUPER BOWL: I think Rodgers, Finley and Jennings come up extra large in the biggest game of their lives. The Ravens keep it close, but Ray Lewis and the defense begins to age before our very eyes. Green Bay 38, Baltimore 20.

the five things i fell in love with today...

1) I know it's somewhat early in the season, but so far I'm batting 1.000 for my 2010 NFL predictions! (Picked the Saints over the Vikings Thursday night).
2) Joe Flacco? Also from South Jersey.
3) The "America's Game" series from NFL Films.
4) The "America's Game" series from NFL Films is free on Hulu.
5) Peter King picked my PITTSBURGH STEELERS to win the Super Bowl this year!!!

song of the day...
"Start me up" by The Rolling Stones

movie of the day...
"Steel Magnolias" ...(to offset all the testosterone in today's blog)

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Vote For Me! ME! MEEEEEE!!!!!

As much as i hate negative campaign ads, i think i'm starting to hate positive ones even more. I just saw a tv commercial for a candidate who will remain nameless. But, apparently, she's a saint. She helps everyone in her community, she loves animals, feeds the hungry, shelters the homeless, adores children, sings in the church choir, and her poo smells of lavender.

Reading in between the lines there on some of that-- but it was just 30 seconds of pure wonderfulness. And, at the end of the spot, she looks right into the camera and says, "My name is (Name Withheld), and I approved this message."


The ad that makes you look like Mother Teresa? That one? You're approving that one...


I mean... I dunno, but I'd think she'd want to at least TRY to look a bit humble at that point, y'know? Like, "My name is So-and-so, and... well, yes, begrudgingly, i would have to approve this message. I may not be the greatest person in the world, but, sheepishly, I have to admit it... I am, in fact, somewhat awesome."

I dunno...

The five things i fell in love with today...

1) It's a beautiful day in New York. Really pretty freaking hot, but beautiful nonetheless.
2) I'M GOING TO SIX FLAGS GREAT ADVENTURE TODAY!!!!! Which is altogether awesome, except... I think i may have a bone spur on my left heel. Which is actually quite painful. Hurts A LOT, as a matter of fact. Really, only a complete moron would consider walking around in a theme park all day with a bone spur on his left heel.
3) Captain Farmville is picking me up in about fifteen minutes.
4) Cinnamon and sugar toast.
5) I am not a politician.

song of the day...
"Poker Face" by Lady Gaga (I don't actually like this song, but just heard it in a movie trailer online, and now it's going to be stuck with me all day. Might as well get used to it, i guess)

movie of the day...
"The American" ...i saw this yesterday afternoon, and i really liked it a lot. BUT!!! There was a HUGE flaw at the end of the flick that i can not for the life of me figure out. It was one of those things where i thought... "Wait... did i miss something??? I must have missed something-- did that just happen???"

Because... i mean, it's impossible to talk about without giving anything away, but... i thought this was an extremely well-crafted film, and... for them to kind of throw in something that so obviously didn't make sense, i really think... y'know, i must've missed something.

If you've seen the movie-- send me an email, because i gotta talk to someone about this!!! It's driving me crazy!!!